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Friday, October 29, 2010

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Halloween Costumes

First, I have a bit of a complaint. When I was growing up, Halloween costumes were scary, but then in the last few years, there was a meeting of the "Halloween Costume High Command," and it was decided that women should wear sexy Halloween costumes.

First off, I grew up in the "scary" costume era and during that time, I also went to church. So, in my Halloween costume wearing years, my normal choices of;

a vampire,
ghoul,
monster, etc now became
Bible Characters.

Bible Characters.

Think about it, the book that parents and clergy use to warn us about the "evils" of sex, we were now using it to create a list of Halloween/Harvest time costumes from.

I actually prayed and begged God to allow a few girls I had crushes on to come as Rahab the Prostitute, Salome the dancer, or Eve (pre fig leaf), but God said no to my creative prayer.

Let me be clear, I was glad my church even had a Halloween/Harvest opportunity to wear a costume at all. Some of my friend's churches didn't even celebrate holidays, so I guess I picked a better church to go to. I can remember my non-holiday celebrating church friends and I would sneak off to the Renaissance Fair and dream. Sigh.

So, my church's Halloween party night came, and the girls came to the church Halloween party as;

The 10 Commandment tablets (her boyfriend came as Moses),
Angels (there were 10 of those),
Joy (Ya know, one of the Fruits if the Spirit. Turns out there was a group of girls that were going to come dressed as all the Fruits of the Spirit (I mean, how cool would it be to go dressed up as 'Self Control'? Yep uber coolness.), but then the other girls changed their mind, came as angels, and never told the girl that was coming dressed up as Joy. The girl dressed up as Joy beat up a few angels at the party when she finally found out. It was quite a scene, angels with black eyes and bloody lips. It turns out Joy had a mean left hook.),
and a Zombie (turns out she got to stay on a technicality. She said she was dressed up as the little girl in the Bible story that Jesus brought back from the dead).

I almost got kicked out of the party, too. I put on a suit, carried a Bible and said I was dressed as Jimmy Swaggart. Yup, I was a Halloween rebel in 1987.

So, women can now come dressed as sexy (anything), and (normal looking) guys have the choice of;

fat Elvis,
a box with dots all over it (case of the measels),
Hobo,
Baseball player,
or not go the party and say they came dressed as the Invisible Man.

Halloween is still a cruel joke for a guy.