Saturday, September 25, 2010

Don't Steal then Hide in a Dumpster, because Today is Trash Day.

Another dumb guy story. This is to incredible to be true, but it is. Wow.

"When police were called out to a robbery at their local Wal-Mart , the suspected thief appeared to vanish into thin air.

For about 40 minutes on Wednesday morning, officers in Alliance, Ohio searched the area for a suspect who was accused of trying to sneak about $1,000 worth of merchandise out of the superstore's side door.

Then the police got a call from an man claiming to be his friend.

Alliance Police Lt. William Morris told Fox 8 News that the caller told police that his friend, James Brienzo, 37, had used his mobile phone to get help."

Read more here

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Top Five Danger Questions and Answers for Guys

Relationships are great, but they can be dangerous as well. Women constantly want to know things - all kinds of things, and so they ask questions - all kinds of questions. There are 10 questions you must be careful on how you answer, and we are here to help.

5. Question: What are you thinking about?
Answer Notes: Women want to be what's on a guys mind all the time, so this question is a bit of a pop quiz for a guy. So guys, avoid a gotcha moment, and prepare.

Possible Answer: (pause, like you are revealing something 'deep down') "You know what I'm thinking about? What to get you for your birthday (or Christmas, Valentine's Day, whatever is coming up soon). I get the same thing for you all the time, and it just bugs me". Sure, she might say, "Yeah, right" at first, but then she will pause and ask, "You're really worried about that?" "Sure. I mean, our relationship is worth more than the same gift all the time, isn't it?" She should be taken aback by your response, and begin to give you ideas. For Heaven's sake guys, write them down. Note: Gotcha moment diffused, and the table have turned on her. You're welcome.

4. Question: If I died, who would you date (or marry)?
Possible Answer: "How can you say that?" "What? I was just wondering," "Do you know how hard it is for one soul mate to find another?" "Well, uh, it was easy for us," "Yes, because I found all the wrong soul mates before you, and now you ask about me losing you. How can you ask that?" "I, uh, I don't know, I was just wondering," "Who would you date (or marry) if I died? How's that?" "Look, I was just wondering," "See, you won't answer"... Again, you're welcome guys.

3. Question: Do I look fat in this?
Possible Answer: "No," "No, I am, you're just saying that," "Hey, you don't trust my judgment?" "Well, no...but," "But what? "You're just saying that. You have to," "No I don't. See, Madison Avenue has you hoodwinked. Let me show you something," She will be thrown off by this, but stand up and walk over to her. More than likely she is standing in front of the mirror, so turn her away from the mirror, "The mirror lies, honey. All the ads are made to crush your self-esteem. Look at me," You may have to lift her chin to look in her eyes, "I'm not a mirror, and I'm not an ad on TV, so you can trust me when I say, you look fantastic". Note: You may have to take an acting class, because you might laugh at any point of your speech. Stay in the moment, and you can escape this danger question alive.

2. Question: Are my friends (or sister) cuter than me?

Answer Note: If you dated her friends or her sister, you're on your own.

Possible Answer: "Honey, where is this coming from?" "Uh, I, uh just wanted to know," "What's behind this?" "Uh, nothing, I uh was just wondering," "What's really going on, here?" This should go on awhile, but never answer honestly - never.

1. Question: Where is this relationship going?

Possible Answer: This never went well for our staff of researchers. You are on your own with this one. Good luck.

Are there any other questions?