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Friday, March 26, 2010

New Shirts are here!

We have been asked and now they are here. Men are Dumb shirts:

Version 1


Version 2


I will be creating more, but these are the first two versions. Thanks for your support and comments.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

The Difference between Men and Women #63 - Greeting Friends #fb



















Greetings friends you haven't seen in awhile is treated differently by Men and Women.


Men, when they see someone they haven't seen in awhile, they usually give them a head lift, and a "Hey, how's it going?" or maybe if it's a really special event (especially if it's a group of guys they have seen in awhile) one of the guys will say, "Hey, there he is!" After that some one arm hugs with back bumping with a fist, high fives, handshakes, and other macho exchanges.


Women, on the other hand treat it much differently. When women meet a group of other ladies they haven't seen in awhile (even though they may have played games on Facebook with them off and on for 6 months) is an important ritual. If a couple arrives, it becomes a high school flashback; Guys go to the guys area, and the women congregate near a doorway. Then, the transformation happens. The women have been the way they are (voice, etc) all the way to the event, but when they see a group of women they haven't seen in awhile, things change;


1. Their voices go up 4 octaves,
2. They hug and hover cheek kiss every woman there,
3. The younger they are, there may be jumping up and down or hand shaking involved (very rare, but it does happen. I've seen it),
4. Eeking, squeeling, and other such sounds,
5. The speed in which they talk increases 20 times, and
6. all the while keeping the Valley Girl accent (including the words, "Cute," "I Know," "Oh my God," and "Love it").


The ear-piercing sound that is created by a female group re-meeting, makes men run away clutching their ears in pain. After that, I'm convinced that Women trade secrets to take over the world and vote on new color names.


Note: For church going folks, this happens every Sunday. Just sayin'


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Thanks for dropping by. I mean it,

Jeff Roney
Writer, Blogger, Comedian, Dumb Guy

RoneyZone Productions - Awesome creations you haven't heard of, til now.
tel.: 714-929-7857
fax:
jeff.roney@gmail.com
http://www.roneyzone.com

Monday, March 22, 2010

A Little Distraction - An Older Love Story #fb





Ask an older person to tell you a story how they fell in love.

I like the movie, When Harry Met Sally. There's lots to like, but some of my favorite parts are the older couples telling how they fell in love. There is something cool about hearing about older people, and how they met, fell in love, got married, and survived without the internet and facebook. Sure, we hear the stories from our families, but if you ever have the opportunity to ask a couple who you don't know (Waiting in a doctor's office, etc), try it. You never know the incredible story of love you might miss, unless you take the risk and ask.



If you like this blog;
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 Thanks for dropping by. I mean it,
Jeff Roney
Writer, Blogger, Comedian, Dumb Guy

RoneyZone Productions - Awesome creations you haven't heard of, til now.
tel.: 714-929-7857
fax:
jeff.roney@gmail.com
http://www.roneyzone.com

Sunday, March 21, 2010

SpotLight - My Wife, Colleen Roney Part 1 #fb









I exist. For those of you that may be wondering if Jeff is just some random single guy spouting a bunch of stuff about men and women, don't worry. I do exist. I'm his wife, Colleen. Jeff and I have been married for 10 and a half wonderful years. We met at work, started dating, fell in love, and got married. It was a fairly brief courtship (we married roughly 15 months after our first date), but it has been the best part of this long ride I call my life.

Here's the story of how we met and fell in love:

I was working for a company as a trainer. Jeff was brought in as another trainer, about 6 months after I was there. I remember distinctly the day he was interviewed - our boss brought him around and introduced him as the newest member of the team who would be starting in a couple of weeks. I recall looking at him and thinking "This poor guy. He's the only guy with a bunch of crazy women. But then again, he's got that married look about him, so he's probably used to crazy women." The minute she walked him around the corner, I forgot what he looked like. No lie. That was my first impression. Two weeks later, he started, but I was out on the road and didn't think much about him. We were sent to the same basic location, but he was at one branch in one city and I was in another branch in a nearby city. We talked via phone. I do recall he asked me some questions, I answered and then he said that he owed me lunch for helping him out. That was a very bold move, but it also kinda gave me the willies. I mean, I didn't know this guy and here he's trying to buy me lunch just for answering some questions? Anyway, as the weeks passed I was out on the road more and more, and so were the others in our small group. So, since everyone was so spread out our boss decided to call a mandatory Saturday meeting. It was so we could get together and discuss policies and procedures, as well as have time to bond with our co-workers we never saw. Great. Just what I wanted. To spend my precious Saturday - my one and only day just for me - with people I work with.

So, we have this meeting and everyone's there, and then after this 4 hour meeting we are supposed to have lunch together. I headed to the restaurant and got there right after Jeff and another co-worker (a very wonderful woman by the name of A.M.), so the three of us got a large booth and waited for the other two folks to show up - our boss and another co-worker. I remember distinctly thinking that I needed to arrange a way for me to sit next to Jeff, and make sure no one else did. I also remember thinking I was a loon and needed to have my head examined. But it worked out that way, and the three of us started talking. Somehow the conversation steered towards the topic of relationships. I found out that Jeff was divorced, not married like I thought. As we were discussing the difficulties of dating in our jobs with all the traveling we were doing, our boss walked up and asked what we were talking about. We told her, and the first thing out of her mouth was "Why don't the two of you start dating?" My brain went into a tail spin. In the span of about 5 seconds I thought to myself "If I say 'sure, why not', Jeff may have one of two reactions - 'Ew, gross', or 'What china pattern shall we pick?' - either of which would be a bad thing for me. Then I thought, "But if I say 'no, thank you' he's going to have one of two reactions - 'Oh, thank God!' or 'I'm going to kill myself' - and I didn't want to see that either. I felt like I was in a hole trying to claw my way out, and at the moment I started to speak, A.M. said "Colleen, don't you have that 'no dating co-workers' policy?" Freedom! I don't have to encourage a raving lunatic or crush a sweet guy! I responded that it is difficult to date co-workers, and then our boss said "Yeah, but weren't you dating Wade recently?" Nice. I got out of the hole and she pushes me back into it. Wade was a tech support guy I went out with a couple of times - as FRIENDS. But it looked like we were dating. Not so much. I explained that I was not dating him - because I was never home to go out with him. Boss lady said "Oh, so it wouldn't be any different dating Jeff." Yeah, I'm going to just sit in the hole.

Needless to say, after that lunch I couldn't stop thinking about Jeff. It actually made me a little crazy. I had pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I wasn't going to date anyone unless they were young and irresponsible (clearly not marriage material), and here was Jeff. Complete opposite. Not that he was old, for those that just gasped that I would call my husband old. But I was talking about 19 and 20 year olds (I was 29 at the time, mind you). I was a cougar before it was fashionable! But I digress....

-- This is Jeff. We will hold the rest of the story til next week. Be sure to come back and here the rest of the great story.

If you like this blog;
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Thanks. :) 

Thanks for dropping by. I mean it,
Jeff Roney
Writer, Blogger, Comedian, Dumb Guy

RoneyZone Productions - Awesome creations you haven't heard of, til now.
tel.: 714-929-7857
fax:
jeff.roney@gmail.com
http://www.roneyzone.com